This has been exciting, life giving and at times it is wearing me out because she is 8 years old and a bundle of energy!
She’s a chatterbox with people she knows and trusts. If she does not know you very well, she will shrink behind me or Mr. Joe and try to become invisible.
I am so thankful that she is with us this month. I think it is helping me push myself into getting better.
The introvert in me is getting a workout for sure. I have to be on my toes listening and interacting at any given time.
I have to be ready to move as far as walking, cooking, doing laundry, keeping things in our small space picked up, etc. Although Mr. Joe has scheduled some time off from his volunteer work this month, it is for special outings that we have planned, not to do the extra chores around the house.
I even started driving for the first time last week. It was the first time in 2 months that I had driven a car on my own and I had almost developed somewhat of a phobia about it because even though the sickness is much better, weakness has settled in my feet and ankles. I succeeded though in driving and am walking with a cane, now, and went up and down 2 flights of stairs twice yesterday very slowly.
When I initially got sick, went into the hospital and realized that I was more seriously sick than a simple cold or flu, I got concerned about Granddaughter #3 coming to visit because the plans were already in the works. I wasn’t sure if I would be well enough but as proof of God’s faithfulness, He got me to a place of being just well enough for her to come and He is using this time to speed up my recovery.
For a time, even after being released from the hospital, I felt like things were falling apart and that I would never be normal again. I would try to seek God’s face and I just could not seem to connect with Him. I felt like He had abandoned me by removing His presence from my life. I would wonder what I had done wrong to cause the abandonment. All I could do was hold onto His extreme faithfulness to me in the past.
People prayed. I tried to seek Him and talk to Him. I did not “feel” His presence but I knew somehow He was there and that His word is true and that He would be faithful to me as He had in the past. I also knew that the outcome might not be the one that I wanted but the one that was in His perfect plan for me.
So, what happens when things fall apart?
What happens when we stand tremblingly face to face with the faceless, dark shroud of death?
What happens when we don’t know how we will ever be able to accomplish the things that we want to accomplish because things have fallen apart?
What about when all of these things happen and we don’t feel the presence of God or we cannot discern His voice?
I have been wondering these things because it seems that although I have walked with God and have spent time with Him, have heard his still, small voice and experienced His faithfulness, it seems that when I am in the lowest depths of spiritual attack that I cannot hear His voice at all. This is when I have to utilize the faith that He has built in me during the easy times. I have to hold onto faith blindly and rely upon the truth that He has ALWAYS been faithful to me!
“Keep walking with me along the path I have chosen for you. Your desire to live close to Me is a delight to my heart. I could instantly grant you the spiritual riches you desire, but that is not My way for you. Together we will forge a pathway up the high mountain. The journey is arduous at times, and you are weak. Someday you will dance light-footed on the high peaks; but for now your walk is often plodding and heavy. All I require of you is to take the next step, clinging to My hand for strength and direction. Though the path is difficult and scenery dull at the moment, there are sparkling surprises just around bend. Stay on the path I have selected for you. It is truly the path of Life.”
Comfirmation to me about this blog as well as the direction my life is going in. Once we give our life to Him we don’t have to worry any more.
So…He has been and will be with me while climbing this mountain no matter how hard it seems and He has been and will continue to be with you while you climb your mountain.
I don’t know about you, but I am looking forward to those “sparkling surprises”. I’m also looking forward to dancing light-footed on the high peaks.
Love and blessings to you,